Shoe-icide

Shoe-icide
Verb: intentionally sacrificing comfort for fashion and wearing shoes that are known to be uncomfortable.  "She committed Shoe-icide last night by wearing her new suede pumps for longer then 2 hours" 

Synonyms: self-destruction, idiocy, martyrdom, misery, tribulation 

I'm not going to lie to you; the shoes I am wearing today are not my correct size. Cute leopard print suede BCBG flats with a lil black bow I found two years ago on sale (when ISN'T BCBG having a sale?) They were the last pair in stock, a size 7.5, half a size too small for me, but such a good deal I couldn't resist.  Wear them bare feet and I'm rendered useless, unable to walk longer than ten feet because my toes crumple up, but throw on a pair of trouser socks and they are slightly more bearable. But still not acceptable, right now I'm sitting with my shoes off of course, wondering why I subject myself to this cruel and unusual torture all for the sake of fashion???   

This is not an epiphany I came upon this morning while driving barefoot, no, no, I have been stewing on this one for a while.

You see, every time I wear heels it’s the same thing, only ten minutes in my feet begin to swell, one hour in I lose sensation in my toes, three hours in (if I’m still crazy enough to be my wearing heels) my toes feel broken and are so swollen I know that if I take the shoes off now I won’t be able to get them back on to hobble out of wherever I may be. Before any of you expect this to mean that my high heel collection is up for grabs I want to assure you that this is in fact not true. This is simply a realization, but I am unsure of whether or not I will change my habits because of said realization. Although it would be wise to pursue more comfortable, practical shoe options my heels are still my favourite.

In fact, it wouldn't even be fair to place all the blame on high heels; I own more than several pairs of flats that massacre my feet, Tory Burch logo flat I am looking at YOU! I was warned by a good friend not to buy these shoes, she offered me honest advice and said if I knew what was good for me I wouldn't spend $230 on a pair of flats that will make my feet bleed, and what did I do? I didn't take her advice; instead I got myself a bright purple pair and wore them only once. These flats are so uncomfortable that the only time I wore them to the mall on a shopping trip I found myself in Michael Kors buying a new pair of flats just so that I could finish my shopping trip with shoes on, bare foot was my next option, you gotta do what you gotta do right?

Why do we constantly do this to ourselves? Why?!?  Us woman are so intent on making a fashion statement that we squeeze our feet into these unnatural positions, use roll on lotions and potions to get our foot to glide into a tight shoe, add insoles and bunion and blister cushions, all for what? At the end of the day I am constantly nursing my feet back to life, massaging to regain circulation, adding Band-Aid’s to my heels and baby toes, and swearing I will NEVER wear those shoes again…..until next weekend. Seriously, its shoe-icide! 

There seems to be no rhyme or reason when it comes to which shoes massacre my feet and which ones I can literally wear for days in a row. Some of my heels are more comfortable then flats. Its a confusing world out there when you're shoe shopping, there are already so many designers and cute shoes to choose from, throw comfort factor in there and I am lost! 

Some of the questions I ask myself when purchasing a shoe are: Can I wear them on a plane trip longer then 5 hours? Can I walking in them for longer then 2 hours? Can I drive in them? And the always important, can I walk in them at all? 

Usually a heel higher then 5 inches will send me flying face first into the pavement. And looking like a fool, not able to walk in your heels is the worst thing any self respecting woman could do. That's an entire new topic for another blog post though...

Often I have thrown all caution to the wind and ignored my conscious and just gone for the shoes that look obviously uncomfortable  Sometimes certain occasions require a killer pair of heels and bleeding toes and broken toe nails (eww) are just the price I am willing to pay. 


So tell me, because I would really like to know. Where do you stand on this issue? Do you commit shoe-icide often? If not, what do you do to avoid these painful situations? 

Also, if anyone has any recommendations of comfy heels please include in the comments below. I already know that Geox and the basic Michael Kors pump are very good options, but I am always looking for an excuse to buy new shoes so please share!