"Swants" for when pants just aren't enough.
Being the spectacular trend setter and fashion reporter I am, I feel it is my civic duty to share all the fantastic nuggets of fashionable info that come my way. In fact it would be an injustice to deprive you of today's latest gone-viral fashion trend.
So without further delay I present to you SWANTS!
Seriously, I said, I PRESENT TO YOU...SWAAAAANTS!! You should be a tad more excited.
What was your initial thought when you first glanced at the opening image of this post? Did you think " Wow that's a happy looking couple lounging in a sketchy looking alley just like today's average couple would". Did you take note of their attire? Layers, which are really big this winter, and they appear to be rocking thermal underwear as outerwear.
I bet you didn't notice that the couple in the image above are actually wearing an old sweater as pants. Yes this new phenomena is known as "Swants", and its taking the fashion world by storm (sorta).
Swants were invented by professional knitter Stephen West because he felt that your "booty deserves to be as warm as your torso". Okay.
West even included step by step instructions with helpful pictures to assist you in incrafting your very own pair. This is one of them.
There's even a video. Set to a Bjork soundtrack because there really is no other appropriate soundtrack when you're wearing a sweater on your legs.
I couldn't watch the video in its entirety, I wanted to, but as it turns out Bjork causes dogs to go bat shit crazy. My dogs were trying to jump up on my table and attack my laptop. I wonder if the veterinary community knows of this astounding scientific discovery?
My other issue was I couldn't tell if this was meant to be ironic or dead serious, and I have some questions. Are they machine washable. Do they transition well from day to night? How do they look when paired with Louboutins? Are they office appropriate?
To search for the answers to my many questions I took to the glorious world wide web and the comments sections of West's blog.
Here is just some of what others have said about Swants ....
"So far I'm having trouble getting the crotch to fit properly".
"The step where you sew the crotch together was a bit confusing".
"I am going to wear mine to a baby shower tomorrow. I’ve always hated those things…"
"Which Bjork album is the song on the video from?"
"Laughing so hard I almost peed my Swants".
So, it seems there is a design flaw with the crotch,which to me is a deal breaker. I mean if I could choose one of the more important areas of my body to protect against a wardrobe malfunction the crotch would be in my top two.
What do you think? Would you dare to make your own pair of Swants? Do you know someone who has already tailored their very own pair? Would you wear them in public or are they best suited for the privacy of your own home?
Are Swants the next big fashion trend? I'm wondering if we will soon see them turn up at American Apparel, will Marc Jacobs put his own spin on them?
If only I could invent the next great fashion trend. Oh wait, I think I have it. Instead of mittens why not wear sock puppets? A good red and white stripe sport sock will match pretty much anything and you cant go wrong with a set of googly eyes. I shall call this new accessory "Sockens". Thoughts? Feelings?